We've come a long way, baby....?

I grew up in the 70s and 80s. Well, as much as I've actually matured, shall we say? ;)

While I'm all for 'equal pay for equal work' and letting men and women choose their occupations, etc, there's still something that bugs me. Let me say, from the outset, that I do NOT consider myself a feminist. I'm a woman. A wife. A mother -- often that job is first and foremost when it comes to my time and attention. I'm also a friend. A writer. A hard worker. And a dreamer.

I believe men and women are equally important in this world and in the grand scheme of things. I do not, however, believe that we are equal in everything. Men and women are inherently different in many ways -- mentally, emotionally and physically.

Not all women are the same, either. Some are nurturers at heart... but not all women carry that trait. Some men are heroic warriors, yet not all are good on the battlefront. It doesn't make them any less womanly or manly. It makes us unique individuals, as intended.

I'm proud of who I am. I also know, however, that I have a long way to go before I become everything I'm capable of being. What worries me, however, is the direction many women of the coming generation seem to be going.

I heard all about the 60s and 'free love' ... sorry, folks, but nothing, NOTHING on this earth is free. I also heard about being liberated and that if it was okay for men to have multiple sex partners -- than, hell yes! It must be okay for the women, as well.

I personally, am very old-fashioned when it comes to sexuality. I am also very conservative when it comes to relationships. But that's beside the point. My questions to women -- especially the younger women today -- are these:

When did become okay to exploit your body for all the world to see? Is this really what the women of the liberation movement fought for? To see their daughters or granddaughters half-naked and performing for any man who cares to look? Is this truly liberation and freedom ... or are women still allowing themselves to be used?

In my most humble opinion, this is not the way to garner true respect. This is not the way to gain liberation or freedom, for you are simply becoming a thing to be drooled over; lusted after; joked about. Sure, you have their attention, but for how long?

I have three daughters and two sons -- I don't want any of them to witness some of the displays of skin and sex that I've seen recently. Someone posted a photo of a doll, in a bikini, attached to the antenna of a truck like a pole-dancer. What does this tell anyone who sees it? Well, it tells me that the person in that vehicle doesn't respect women. They are seen as things, not human beings with minds and feelings.

Is that what young woman of today really want? Attention at all costs? Lust instead of love? Leering instead of respect?

You can be beautiful, ladies, without showing every inch of skin possible. You can be sexy without being crude and cheap. You can have respect from others -- if you show respect for yourselves.

I only hope more young woman start to care.

Is it romance?

I just finished reading a new romantic suspense. Not only was the title just published, but it was written by an author who is new to me.

Now to analyze...

I liked the book. Sort of. :\ Honestly, the plot was a bit more sci-fi than suspense and I'm not a huge, huge fan of the genre. Oh, I like to watch Star Trek in its various forms; I love the Star Wars movies (the original three more-so); I've even enjoyed the occasional Ray Bradbury story from time to time.

So what's my problem? Well, it wasn't just with this current read -- I've had this come up in two other romantic suspense titles (two of a series). But in all three books I'm brought up short by one simple thing:

The hero isn't quite 'heroic'. In all truth, the stories themselves -- particularly this last -- weren't exactly what I'd term 'romantic'.

There was no real falling in love in this last read--more of an obsessive sexual bonding and manipulation. There wasn't any deep emotion. Yes, lots of hot sex; the heroine slowly begins to sneak beneath the tough hero's shell (this revealed only through his inner dialogue); the heroine doesn't even know the hero's identity until the very last page! Yep, you probably guessed it -- there's a sequel coming out later this summer. ***NOTE: Add this to my pet-peeve list.***

But falling in love? Romance? I didn't see it.

Am I just old-fashioned? Maybe. But now I'm wondering is this is simply another take on the bad-boy hero OR if this is the direction our romance novels are headed?

When I say 'bad-boy', I don't mean the classic rebel in leather riding a Harley... or the tom cat who treats all women like sex-objects until he encounters the heroine. I don't even mean the bad-ass Alpha dudes that prowl the pages of such works as Kenyon's DARK-HUNTER series. I'm talking BAD, such as those men who kill for a living (albeit usually under the thumb of some ultra-secret government agency). I'm talking about men who use sex as a weapon -- literally -- even against the heroine herself.

Exciting? Sure, I'll admit, it can be. After all, if they use sex as a tool, we can safely assume they sure know what they're doing between the sheets. We all have our little fantasies -- even ones we don't recognize until we're squirming as we read the book. ;)

But is it healthy? Is it romance?

I'm not so sure. What do you think?