Stupid product labels

It's been a rough week -- sick kiddos and so forth -- and I needed a good laugh. Thought I'd share these stupid product labels. My question is: Are consumers really this dumb?

1. On a blanket from Taiwan
NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.

2. On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists
REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.

3. On a Taiwanese shampoo
USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.

4. On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink
AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.


6. In a US guide to setting up a new computer
TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING.
(Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)

8. In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles
OPEN OTHER END.

9. On a packet of Sunmaid raisins
WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL?

10. On a Sears hairdryer
DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.

11. On a bag of Fritos
YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY.
DETAILS INSIDE.

12. On a bar of Dial soap
DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.

13. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert
(printed on bottom of the box)
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.

14. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.

15. On a Korean kitchen knife
WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.

16. On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights
FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.

17. On a Japanese food processor
NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.

18. On Sainsbury's peanuts
WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.

19. On an American Airlines packet of nuts
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.

20. On a Swedish chainsaw
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.

21. On a child's superman costume
WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY.

22. On some frozen dinners
SERVING SUGGESTION DEFROST.

23. On a hotel provided shower cap in a box
FITS ONE HEAD.

24. On packaging for a Rowenta iron
DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.

25. On Boot's "Children's" cough medicine
DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.

26. On Nytol sleep aid
WARNING MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With

Sunglasses on and point Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.

See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise

Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask

If They Want Fries with That.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It

"In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once

Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions,

Switch To Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For

Smuggling Diamonds"

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With

The Prophecy."

8. Don't use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat

with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To

Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems

Don't Rhyme

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And

Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You

Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The

Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your

Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I

Won!, I Won!"

18.

When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The

Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're

Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The

Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.......

Send This list to Someone To Make

Them Smile.