Mama didn't tell me...

I grew up an only child and therefore missed out on a lot of the dynamics you find in a large family. Well, I'm not missing out anymore. But here is a short list of the things my mom neglected to mention. Partly because she'd forgotten; partly because I'm sure I wouldn't have listened in the first place.


Siblings will fight 24/7 about nothing in particular if you let them.

Children's voices have the knack of making a grown woman cry if they hit a certain pitch. Especially if the woman has a headache to begin with.

Male children are just as emotional -- and sometimes more so -- than female children.

While teen girls get bitchy one week a month, boys can lose it whenever they want. There is little or no warning. No chance to prepare and seek shelter.

When one child is gone -- no matter which child -- the noise level is reduced in half; the number of fights reduced by 1/3; boredom level rises by 1/5.

When all else fails, bribe them for some peace a quiet. You know you will, so let's make it 'legal', shall we?

Having more than one child is an adventure. Having more than three is a zoo. Good thing I like zoos. ;)

You will love your children more than anything; you will never, ever stop being their mother; you will never stop worrying about them.

You will forever be known as so-and-so's mom. And honestly, that's not such a bad identity to have. ;)

The last days of summer....

Summer is coming to an end here in the good ol' US of A. No, in truth it lasts until the end of September, but you'd never guess that by the weather.

Am I looking forward to fall? Yes and no. Like most moms, I anticipate school starting back. I love Halloween -- it's one of my favorite holidays -- and this coming season is my favorite over-all.

But, unlike most moms, I can't look forward to my kids running off and leaving me alone for five or six hours a day. We home school. Yes, voluntarily. ;)

However, I do look forward to the new classes; to learning and re-learning new things along with my little brood. I enjoy watching their eyes light up when something 'clicks'. Most of the time I manage a silent chuckle when they ask the age-old question: "When will I EVER need this?!?!?!"

My answer? I usually say: "You won't, but do it anyway! You can torture your own kids with it someday."

Humor can soothe a lot of angst. ;)

What kind of Fairy are you?

The Air Fairy is teeming with creative energy. She loves all art, music, stories, imaginion, anything that helps her escape her own boring reality. She pours all her emotion into what she does, which makes her an extraordinary artist. Her natural exhuberance gains her many friends, but she likes being by herself doing what she does best, dreaming! She's friendly, but sometimes seems distant and often loses herself (or others) in her thoughts. She might seem eccentric, but it's just her being herself, which is what everyone should do!

Writing contest!

Romance Junkies is having its annual Writing Contest. I was bored and managed to talk myself into entering. Twice. Oy!

Anyhow, the first entry is up this week. Title: DREAM WALK. Yes, I used another name because that's what they ask us published folks to do. LOL! If you have a chance, drop by and read the entries and VOTE!

Post-submission rules

I spent the last few weeks finishing up -- and obsessing -- over a new submission. With most of my writing at this time, I do not have a deadline unless it's self-imposed. This time, it wasn't. Which meant simply this: I HAD to get it DONE!

I'm happy to report that I did. (At least, I think I did...it's all a little fuzzy at the moment.) I got the story submitted right under the wire. Literally. Now I have to wait until the appointed time to find out if the editors like my story enough to offer that golden contract.

I have a few rules that I've worked out for myself that must be followed after each and every submission. And since my brain is about mush today, I thought I'd share them here:

The number one rule is simple but difficult to stick to:

DO NOT, DO NOT, DO NOT read the story before you hear back from the editor.

**I learned that one the hard way. You can't imagine the number of typos and other goofs I've 'discovered' after sending the story off -- no matter how many times I've proofed it up to that point. It's disheartening and discouraging and will make your wait seem even longer. If you've sent it out, you're done. At least for now...don't torture yourself any further. The editor will surely do it for you. ;)

2. Start another story ASAP...or continue with a wip you've left dangling. This is so important for me, because the post-submission blahs set in so quickly. If I don't jump right back on that horse, then I'm sure to run into one monster of a writer's block. Not fun. Besides, loosing yourself in another story will help the time you wait go by a bit faster.

3. The last 'rule' -- CELEBRATE! Even if the story isn't sold, you've finished it! You are among the small minority of writer-wannabees who actually wrote: THE END. It's an accomplishment and something of which you should be very proud. :)

Anyone else have rules they want to share? Whether it's for after submitting, finishing a first draft, or finishing ANYTHING important to you? :)

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With

Sunglasses on and point Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.

See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise

Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask

If They Want Fries with That.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It

"In."

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once

Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions,

Switch To Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For

Smuggling Diamonds"

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With

The Prophecy."

8. Don't use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat

with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To

Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems

Don't Rhyme

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And

Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You

Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The

Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your

Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I

Won!, I Won!"

18.

When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The

Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're

Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The

Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.......

Send This list to Someone To Make

Them Smile.

Move those glutes!

One of the big hazards with spending hours a day at the computer -- whether you're a writer, a paper-pusher, accountant, student or whatever -- is the definite lack of exercise we get. Add to that our 'must have' snacks, which honestly do sometimes spark creativity, and we can wind up more than a little out of shape. OR in a shape we'd rather not discuss... pears come to mind, however. ;)

I realize just how far I've let myself go when I manage to get sore from doing simple things like weeding the garden. Yeah, that's bad! So...off to the gym I go; determined to keep those pounds from creeping up on me again and sure that this time, I'll get that buff, trim and toned body I've always dreamed of having.

Trouble is, determination and life often collide. As do my inherent leanings toward the couch-potato syndrome AND my love of all things sweet. :P But I think I've finally come up with a compromise:

I move whenever possible. It can be weeding the garden or walking the dog or jumping on the trampoline with the kiddos or taking things up and down the stairs instead of getting one of the kids to do it. I make myself take whatever opportunity I can to put my body in motion. (That, combined with what I learned at Weight Watchers about eating habits, goes a long way in helping.)

For instance, instead of sitting on my butt and reading that book I can't put down, I take it to the gym and read while on the exercise bike. Reading is my reward and the bike doesn't seem so monotonous. I would try the treadmill, but my 'graceful' gene is somewhat limited. ;)

We all need to take time and put our glutes in motion! It's so essential for a more vital and healthy life. And while reading a hot love scene can get your blood pumping, pumping iron can give us all a real work out...and more stamina. If you know what I mean. (GGG)

Randomness in random order...

My dear friend, crit partner and colleague, Laura Hamby, tagged me. :)

Here are the rules: Each blogger should list 7 random facts/habits about themselves. People who are tagged need to then report this on their own blog with their 7 random facts as well as these rules. They then need to tag 7 others and list their names on their blog. They are also asked to leave a comment for each of the tagged, letting them know they have been tagged and to read the blog.

So, here goes...

1. I love chocolate milk made with Nesquik and skim milk.

2. My favorite shoes are a pair of orange sandals with a big sequined flower on top. They're wearing out, however, and I'll cry when I have to throw them out. :(

3. My favorite season is the fall. I love the bright colors -- red, orange, yellow and gold -- that the leaves turn. I love the way the air smells. I love hot apple cider with a cinnamon stick. I love Halloween. :)

4. I love thunderstorms as long as the lightning doesn't strike the ground or anything close. I like the way the air smells and the rain washes everything clean. Just keep the power on and give me a book to read. ;)

5. My favorite dessert is homemade chocolate chip cookies -- made with real butter, of course -- and a glass of ice cold milk.

6. I sing a lot -- and loudly at times. I love all kinds of music except rap and opera.

7. I've seen just about every animated Disney, Pixar and Dreamworks movie made since... oh, 1990. ;) I own many of them AND I still like to watch most of them.

Hate to be a party-pooper, but I'm not going to tag anyone back. Just did this not long ago and can't think of seven new friends to bug. ;)

I understand them?!?!?!

You Have Your PhD in Men

You understand men almost better than anyone. You accept that guys are very different, and you read signals well. Work what you know about men, and your relationships will be blissful.

How Well Do You Understand Men?

Well, apparently I do! Who knew? LOL! Certainly not me...well, I wasn't completely sure on this. But it makes sense. I've been told by at least one male -- another romance writer, Josh Lockwood -- that I do very well in writing the male POV. I suppose 'understanding' them in general terms helps. So how well do YOU understand men? And if any male wants to take the quiz, I'd love to know how accurate it really is.

Have a great week!

Just the facts...and then some.

I'm in the midst of writing a short story and I've discovered I now have to go back to finish my research. Oh joy.

I'd rather be writing, honestly, but I know the story will suffer if I try to fudge the facts even a little. Sure, as writers we have the liberty to 'make up' people, places, crimes, fashion... hell we can create entire worlds and realities! But for this story -- a paranormal, historical romance with suspenseful elements -- I need facts. Dates. Places. Even names. I need a sense of the environment and culture of the time. All this goes into making a story -- yes, a fictional story -- seem more real to the reader.

Can I tell you a secret? You've probably figured it out already, but I HATE this part. If I were a wealthy woman I'd hire someone to do the ground work for me. Seriously. Let some poor flunkie sift through the mounds of info and verify the truth from total fiction or speculation. That alone would save hours of my time. Like I said, I'd rather devote those hours to creating the story.

But even a small fortune wouldn't get me out of all the research. I'd still have to jump in and look at the information for myself. As a writer, you're lucky to use even half of the info you come up with in the actual story. If you use too much -- particularly in historical -- the reader's eyes can glaze over and you've lost them. It's all about balance.

But you cannot write about something if you don't know it or understand it. Remember, I didn't say "write what you know", that's very limiting. What I am saying is you have to know what you're writing about. You have to learn about it.

Being a writer is more than stringing words together in a decent fashion. It's so much more. It involves imagination, creativity, long-suffering, diligence, an open mind, and constant learning and growth. Even if it's that stuff, like Algebra, that leaves you wondering: "Will I ever need this?".

Um, probably not. But do it anyway. ;)

How's it growing?

Summertime at our house means lots of things, but the primary change is that we plant a garden. Willingly? Not me. See the black thumb? Plants do NOT thrive under my 'care'. Hey, I figure I've gave birth to and raised (to some extent or other) five fairly healthy children. That deserves some credit, right?

My dh, however, is the farm boy. Literally. He grew up on one and knows quite a bit about the whole planting/harvesting process. What he still can't seem to figure out is why I do NOT want to plant vegetables that no one -- except him -- will ever eat. I love him, really, I do. But come on! They're called 'wax beans' for a reason! IE: They taste like WAX!

Anyhow, every year we go through the garden thing. He plows, tills, fertilizes, plants seeds and/or small plants, and we wait. Water. Weed. Wait some more. Repeat, ad naseum, until the whole thrill of growing our own veggies wears really thin. That time comes around August when the temps are up in the 90s; the humidity is about 70%; and the weeds are fast beating out the real plants.

Don't get me wrong -- I do enjoy growing our own food. Being able to pluck fresh tomatoes and corn right off the plant is great! And it tastes so much better than anything you can buy in the store. But it is a lot of work and I sometimes wonder (mostly on those 90+ days) if it's worth it all.

Yeah, when I think about it, I admit it is worth the work. We learn a lot from our garden. We've learned just how well zucchini can be frozen and how much the kids love zucchini bread in the fall. :) We actually have fun doing the work together, as a family. It's one of those schmaltzy bonding things we do. ;) Our kids learn the value of work and see the results in a relatively reasonable amount of time. Plus, it does save some money here and there.

Most importantly, we've learned what to grow and what not to bother with... remember those Wax Beans? Heh. Only two of plants actually grew from those seeds. *No, I didn't do a thing to them -- although I was sorely tempted.* We also learned, very early on, that 43 tomato plants is way, way too many. Even for a family of seven. :P

Soothing the beast...

I've never written a shapeshifter character before. It's an interesting change of pace -- minor pun intended. ;) But honestly, I've got to believe that even with the added benefit of changing physical forms, a hero is a hero.

He still has to be sexy, intelligent (Yes, that is a must), gentle with his heroine, tough on the villain, and maybe even a little tough on himself. What else does a hero possibly need? To give him an extra gift -- or maybe curse -- only adds to the drama unfolding. It gives us another conflict that has to be overcome.

Not too far off from real life, isn't it? We all have 'gifts' and 'curses'. Things we have to live with or without. We all have conflict. Life without conflict is impossible unless you're either very deluded or living in a vacuum. Conflict can help us grow even though it causes pain.

But I think that's why so many people love to read -- and why so many love romance. If there's one thing you can count on in a true romance, it's that there will be a happy ending. The "HAPPILY EVER AFTER" fairytale finish that we don't always get in the real world. So we like to read about flawed heroes and heroines... ones with obstacles to overcome. We need someone to cheer on to victory ... confident that the writer will somehow make it work out in the end. The good guys win and love prevails. We need that, because it gives us a little bit of hope, perhaps. Not to mention a small hour or two of escape from the turmoil in our own lives.

Although having a hero who can shift at will from man to beast is a new experience for me, it's not as difficult as I first thought. He seems to relish the power I've given him -- it has completed his personality, his backstory and his conflict.

Just one more thing to figure out ... What happens to his clothes?

LOL! Yes, I am the practical one. ;)

Summertime blahs...

A fellow author was complaining recently about her teenage daughter's penchant for sitting around doing nothing. I started thinking about it, wondering how many other moms and dads out there have this problem?

I remember during my summers off of school. I would be so thrilled for about a week or two, then bored out of my mind. I'd spend most of my time reading and watching television, with the odd trip or two to a pool with friends. Summer vacations were few and being a typical teen, I was determined to NOT enjoy them. LOL!

How do you keep your kids busy when the excitement of "No school!" becomes the whine of "I'm Bored!" ??? Or maybe worse yet, they just sit there like lumps of modeling clay, baking in the glow of the television screen, refusing to do a blasted thing?

I make mine read. Well, the older two don't need any threats where that's concerned. We also have the blessing of a YMCA family membership, so many afternoons are spent at the pool. They also have sleepovers; the odd movie here and there; lazy days watching cartoons and bouncing on the trampoline. My children are pretty good at keeping themselves entertained. It's when they start arguing that I have to step in and give them something different to do.

Anyone want to share their tricks or secrets? Or you can just vent if you'd like. (GGG)

LAST weekend!!!

Week Six - This is the last week of the SAMHAIN SPRING SHOWERS contest and this week we have FIFTEEN yes FIFTEEN wonderful prizes for you all to win!

So what are you wasting time for, get on down and comment on those excerpts before the weekend is over and you've lost your chance.

The prizes for this last and final week are.

1. One ebook download of any of Samhain Publishing's ebooks
2. One print copy of Jean Marie Ward's and Teri Smith's With Nine You Get Vanyr
3. One free print copy of Summer Devon's Taming Him
4. One free ebook download from Kate Jonhson's Samhain listing, a signed cover and goodies
5. One free ebook download from any of Alexis Flemings ebooks at Samhain Publishing
6. One free ebook download of Beverly Rae's Touch Me
7. One free ebook download of Gia Dawn's Lady Strumpet
8. One free ebook download of Kim Rees's Buying MacKenzie's Baby
9. One free ebook download of Meg Allison's Alaina's Promise
10. One free ebook download of Rene Lyon's The Daystar
11. One free ebook download of Rose Marie Wolf's Sweet Moon Dreams
12. One free ebook download of Brenda Williamson's Wolverton Blood
13. One free ebook download of Annmarie McKenna's Two Sighted
14. An assortment of exotics Asian doodads, (incense, timber bookmarks, handmade notebook)
15. One five dollar gift certificate to MB&B

This contest ends at midnight EST on Sunday 27th May Here's the LINK: COFFEE TIME ROMANCE FORUM

Cats, kids and mothering...

The kids have all been sick over the past two weeks to varying degrees. Anyone from a larger family knows the drill: if one gets it, the rest will. And if it's really bad, then it gets passed back through for an encore.

So we have three on antibiotics; one with a residual cough; and one who is basically just cranky. Oh, then there's the sick cat.

Everyone has been worried about the cat. Her personality and habits changed dramatically; she wasn't eating much or drinking any water; all she wanted to do was sleep. Yeah, I was worried about the pet food recall for a time -- wondering if somehow she got hold of some bad food. Seems it's just a virus or infection. Honestly, I think she caught the family cold. :P

One dose of antibiotic and she's already feeling a bit better. She's chasing the kids; batting at moths... getting back to her natural self. It's such a relief! Being a people mom is hard enough -- mothering an animal is one monster of a job! Especially when you don't speak the native tongue. ;)

Kids and pets are so similiar -- no uproar, they are! You worry about them when they're sick; feel helpless when you can't 'fix it'; and baby them when they don't feel good. Case in point: the cat wouldn't drink water, so I enticed her with milk. She wouldn't eat cat food, so I brought out the tuna. Real tuna, not the cat food variety. Yes. We have been spoiling her rotten.

Now I'm curious to see what she'll expect as she gets better. Will she wonder where the milk is? Why the tuna doesn't appear at meal time? Will she boycot her usual meal?

The kids know that once they get better, the babying stops. Well, for the most part. Animals aren't quite capable of such logic. But I have a feeling the cat will accept her fate -- and eat the kitty kibble.

Unless someone happens to get a hankering for a tuna sandwhich. ;)

Blogging today...

I blogged today at Shades of Suspense ... pop on over and check it out. :) The blog has a slightly new look, too. I think you'll like it.

Not your mama's music?

Or is it?

I've been a fan of country music for a few years now, but I seem to go through cycles in my life and am beginning to branch out again. At the moment, I'm turning a bit more toward rock/pop music -- partly thanks to my wonderful teenage daughters. :)

Does it seem odd that a teen turns the parent on to new music, new bands? Maybe, but in our house, that's just the way of things. No, I don't try to act like a teenager, although I think it comes naturally at times. ;) But I've always had very eclectic taste in music.

My oldest daughters and I like the many of the same things -- music, movies, television shows. We connect over clothes, stories, you name it! They are my best friends as well as my daughters.

So who have I 'discovered' thanks to my girls? Evanescence... Daughtery... Nickelback... the list goes on. But it works both ways -- they like some of my favorites including Keith Urban and an old-time favorite, Journey, to name a few.

Music is very important in our family. My dh and I have both sung to and with our children since they were babies. Our family even has two special songs just for the dog. :) But it's always been that way for me --- music expresses my moods, stirs my memories, and inspires my muse. Most of my stories and books have 'soundtracks', and I know quite a few authors who are the same way. I think it all has to do with that creative side of our brains... music etches itself on our minds and in our souls.

Next time you hear a song you like, don't dismiss it as something your mom wouldn't care for. Sure, you know her better than I do, but sometimes it's nice to share... you just might be surprised. ;)

Tagged! -- Eight random facts...

Okay, I've been tagged by my friend and fellow writer, Leslie Dicken.

Here are the rules:

1. Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.

2. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.

3. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.

4. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

8 random facts/habits about me …


1. I have two main nicknames: Alli and Gator. No, on the surface I don't look or act much like a gator, but then it's the quite ones you have to watch out for. ;)

2. I have five children -- all from my one and only marriage; all on purpose. Yes, I know that in itself is certifiable...but I didn't stop there....

3. I home school all of my children, grades 1, 3, 6, 9 & 10. Crazy? Probably. But they love me anyway.

4. I love to act and sing. If I had a different temperament and/or confidence, I might have gone for a career in one or the other. As it is, I really think the acting thing helps in my writing.

5. I adore Gerry Butler. He's sexy, charismatic, has the most beautiful eyes and abs... SIGH. Don't tell Leslie! She thinks he's hers. ;)

6. I love Alfred Hitchcock movies. My favorites are Rear Window and Marnie (Sean Connery at 30-something, yum!).

7. I hate to cook. I do it, naturally, and can follow a recipe with the best of them, but it just isn't my 'thing'. I prefer to create something that lasts longer than fifteen minutes. :)

8. I've always wanted to learn ballroom dancing -- I loved the movie, Dirty Dancing. But my dh isn't a big dance fan. One of these days, however... either that or belly dancing. (GGG)

Now I'm going to TAG my buddies: Sara, Nell, Amelia, Glo, Gracie, Marie-Nicole, Emma, and Lorribelle.

More showers...

More, more, more.

More excerpts are now up on the Samhain Spring Shower forum contest,

CoffeeTime Romance Forum
More chances for you to enter and win one of three fabulous prizes.

This weeks prizes:

One print copy of With Nine You Get Vanyr by Jean Marie Ward and Teri Smith
One Beth Williamson ebook download of choice (from Samhain Publishing)
One ebook download of Strip Tease by Kate Davies

So come along and make a comment, any comment (though the nicer ones would be more appreciated :) ) and get your entries into this free draw.

Winners of last's week's draw will be announced here and on the forum, tomorrow.

Come on! How easy can it possibly get? (GGGG) Just comment and you could win!

Is it romance?

I just finished reading a new romantic suspense. Not only was the title just published, but it was written by an author who is new to me.

Now to analyze...

I liked the book. Sort of. :\ Honestly, the plot was a bit more sci-fi than suspense and I'm not a huge, huge fan of the genre. Oh, I like to watch Star Trek in its various forms; I love the Star Wars movies (the original three more-so); I've even enjoyed the occasional Ray Bradbury story from time to time.

So what's my problem? Well, it wasn't just with this current read -- I've had this come up in two other romantic suspense titles (two of a series). But in all three books I'm brought up short by one simple thing:

The hero isn't quite 'heroic'. In all truth, the stories themselves -- particularly this last -- weren't exactly what I'd term 'romantic'.

There was no real falling in love in this last read--more of an obsessive sexual bonding and manipulation. There wasn't any deep emotion. Yes, lots of hot sex; the heroine slowly begins to sneak beneath the tough hero's shell (this revealed only through his inner dialogue); the heroine doesn't even know the hero's identity until the very last page! Yep, you probably guessed it -- there's a sequel coming out later this summer. ***NOTE: Add this to my pet-peeve list.***

But falling in love? Romance? I didn't see it.

Am I just old-fashioned? Maybe. But now I'm wondering is this is simply another take on the bad-boy hero OR if this is the direction our romance novels are headed?

When I say 'bad-boy', I don't mean the classic rebel in leather riding a Harley... or the tom cat who treats all women like sex-objects until he encounters the heroine. I don't even mean the bad-ass Alpha dudes that prowl the pages of such works as Kenyon's DARK-HUNTER series. I'm talking BAD, such as those men who kill for a living (albeit usually under the thumb of some ultra-secret government agency). I'm talking about men who use sex as a weapon -- literally -- even against the heroine herself.

Exciting? Sure, I'll admit, it can be. After all, if they use sex as a tool, we can safely assume they sure know what they're doing between the sheets. We all have our little fantasies -- even ones we don't recognize until we're squirming as we read the book. ;)

But is it healthy? Is it romance?

I'm not so sure. What do you think?